As the 6 readers of this blog that aren't writers of this blog know, our most consistent feature is our monthly Sound Test where we (Timo, and one time me) pick some of our favorite video game music in order to share our favorite tunes with you. Timo and I were recently discussing this segment and came up with an idea for a fun little twist, we are also going to start sharing some of our least favorite songs with you. I don't know if this will be as regular an occurrence as the normal Sound Test blogs, but it should be fun none the less, so lets get started by cranking up the volume and listening to 2 of my least favorite pieces of 8 bit diarrhea.
CAUTION LISTEN AT YOUR OWN RISK
First up on the plate we have the over world music from Friday the 13th on the NES. Unfortunately, this song is such an affront to the ears that no one has taken the time to give it its own youtube video, so we will have to make due with this video that compiles all the songs in the game. The song we are after is the first one in the video so don't worry about scrolling to look for it. That 4 second looped pathetic excuse for music is the main song in the game. This is the song that you will be listening to for over 70% of your play time. I guarantee you that if you play this game for more than an hour (which would be amazing the quality of this song pretty accurately reflects the quality of the game) you will forever have this piece of putrid garbage burned into your brain. I swear sometimes at night I can't sleep because every time I lay in a quiet room all I can hear is DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH, and I know that it is impossible for you to interpret the text that I just wrote as music since it has no indication of pitch or rhythm, but I don't care because this piece of crap loop isn't music. In fact I honestly believe that my text interpretation of it is more satisfying to listen to, because listening to nothing is infinitely more satisfying than subjecting your ears to the vomit inducing vileness that is the Friday the 13th over world music.
Now my next pick for the worst of the worst that video game music has to offer may surprise some of you, Mega Man 2 Dr. Wily's music. Now don't freak out I am not talking about the balls to walls Stage 1-2 music, obviously that song is beastly and one of the best pieces of music that the NES ever gave us. I am talking about the insult that is the next song you will hear in Wily's Castle. Just listen to this garbage. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!! You are all pumped on the edge of your seat full of adrenaline from the face melting power of the first song in Wily's castle, and then the game is like C-C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER! I can't even imagine what they were thinking with this one.
"Well gee that last song was awesome, I guess since we can't write anything better than that we should just try our best to produce the most mind numbing thing we can. I got it we will just take a boring 6 second piece of ass, and then sequence it higher and higher 9 million times!"
I will never be able to fully impart on you people how much I hate this song. Whenever I put the Mega Man II OST on to listen to while I walk to class I feel super pumped, and then this disgusting joke of a song comes on and I just wanna lay down in the middle of the street and let a bus run me over.